angus1949

angus1949 - Ed

Published on December 14, 2009 By DPCloud In Community

One of my favorite people will be going in for cataract surgery next week and I thought it would be nice to start a thread to wish him well or at least leave him in stitches.

Ed I hope all goes well and here are the;

Top Ten Things You Don't Want To Hear During Surgery

1 Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.

2 Nurse, did this patient sign the organs donation card?

3 Damn! Page 84 of the manual is missing!

4 Everybody stand back! I lost a contact lens!

5 Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie

6 Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.

7 "Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"

8 Whoa, wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?

9 "Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Hell, he's got two of 'em

10 What do you mean "You want a divorce?"

Comments (Page 4)

karmat

on Dec 29, 2009

That was my nu;rse! OMG. I wondered about the rolling over problem and asked why an eye doc needed to do a DRE. At least my hind site will be 20/20.

Will keep my fingers crossed and my prayers up-to-date for your next appt, Ed!

starkers

on Dec 29, 2009

That was my nu;rse! OMG. I wondered about the rolling over problem

If I had been your nurse, there would have been NO rolling over problem... one look with your much improved vision and you woulda rolled over with great ease... to look the other way.

Unfortunately the left eye I had done on the 28th has not faired as well. I have a follow-up on the 31st to see what can be corrected.

I sure hope they can correct that for you.

DrJBHL

on Dec 29, 2009

Mark...I hope you know it's all in fun, mate! Put Shaunna to work on some shops!

If I had been your nurse, there would have been NO rolling over problem... one look with your much improved vision and you woulda rolled over with great ease... to look the other way.

starkers

on Dec 30, 2009

Mark...I hope you know it's all in fun, mate!

Of course I know it's all In fun. That's why I join in with self-disparaging remarks and auto-recriminations (that's sort of like the opposite of auto-eroticism).

Besides, I'm too darned lazy to take offence... takes more (mental/emotional) energy than laughing/smiling, and I ain't expending any more than I have to.

DrJBHL

on Dec 30, 2009

Of course I know it's all In fun.

Thanks, mate. I'd never wish to hurt a friend's feelings...even inadvertently.

BoXXi

on Dec 30, 2009

I hope everything is ok Ed....... Take care mate.

starkers

on Dec 30, 2009

Of course I know it's all In fun.

Thanks, mate. I'd never wish to hurt a friend's feelings...even inadvertently.

I know that, you're too good-hearted and considerate... besides being a true gentleman.

You too, Ed!

angus1949

on Jan 01, 2010

Thanks guys, and Boxxi it's great to see you back around a bit more often.

Nimbin

on Jan 01, 2010

34. We put your testicles into a bottle just like you requested

DrJBHL

on Jan 01, 2010

hey, mate. Let's keep it 'above the belt'.

angus1949

on Jan 01, 2010

Nimbin, that gave me a stomach ache all the way to my throat.

starkers

on Jan 01, 2010

hey, mate. Let's keep it 'above the belt'.

SORRY........ (can't help myself)

35: I regret to inform you, Mr Ed, but we inserted your penile implants the wrong way... as in backwards... which means that when somebody says "go eff yourself" your really will be able to.

Nimbin, that gave me a stomach ache all the way to my throat

36: Stomach ache will be the least of your problems if your implant decides to get all 'happy'

angus1949

on Jan 04, 2010

As long as it's the super sized implant I ordered all is well. Now if I got bigger shoes I could see my feet too.

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